


Short, fast and loud

by Gloriette_deWentz5



Series: The Bet Café [2]
Category: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Fan-suggested, Fast!Animal racing, Fast!Bromance refs, Fast!College/Univ AU, Fast!In memoriam..., Fast!Mikey/Kristen mention, Fast!No bandmates ships, Lod!Don't read if you don't like smut, Loud!Read note for details, Loud!Shameless smut, Other, Short!Black out, Short!Bromance refs, Short!Middle Names, Short!No ships, Short-Loud!Surprisingly in this one they're an actual band, What kind of scenario is this?, just for fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-11
Updated: 2016-02-22
Packaged: 2018-04-08 08:28:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4297722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gloriette_deWentz5/pseuds/Gloriette_deWentz5
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Triplet of unconnected stories, the only thing the have in common is that the first one is about being short, the second one about being fast, and the last one is about being loud :v<br/>Plots suggested by readers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. SHORT

**Author's Note:**

  * For [PunkPocahontas](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PunkPocahontas/gifts), [The_Nerd_Extremist](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Nerd_Extremist/gifts).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He can’t reach that shelf first."  
> "Sure he can."
> 
> Patrick finds himself caught in one of the most ridiculous of bets, under the pressure of a blackout, hunger, and the use and abuse of middle names.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is for PunkPocahontas; love you kid, thanks for being the first comment on this craziness. Hope you like it as much as I liked writing it :D And hope the scenario is not that... idk, insane :P  
> Be waiting for "Fast" anytime soon, I already have an idea for that one :)

For some reason nobody can explain they were locked in the recording studio. I mean, it’s not like there was no reason, and it wasn’t actually a bad place to be locked in, but why on Earth did the light decided to go out just in that moment? The doors security worked with electricity, so now they only had access to the bathroom and a little office, but not the world outside. The reason of the blackout: Unknown.

Andy, Joe, Mikey and Ray went around the studio looking for matches, candles and maybe flashlights, ‘cause the phones weren’t enough and they needed communication; Frank, Pete and Patrick just sat around in the office waiting, well it was more like Frank standing, Pete sitting and Patrick sleeping at the table; Gerard had gone to the bathroom, and that’s all they knew about him by that time. They hadn’t eaten, but they were lucky enough to find a little vending machine with enough food until the lights came back. The thing is, none of them had money, they had left their wallets in their cars and lockers outside, and those things work with, well, electricity, don’t they? Yep Frank, they do.

Frank’s idea of breaking the glass to get the food was out of question, because they’d have to pay for it later, and they were a rising project, so they had no money for that. So by the time the other ones arrived with one old flashlight and a little candle, they just sat and waited. Joe started looking around to kill time, and that’s when he spotted a little key in the highest shelf over the coffee machine, before he could get close to it, Frank hurried and tried to get it, without success.

"Ah, fuck, I can’t get the key of that shelf." complained Frank a little pissed off.

"Course you can’t," replied Pete "you’re a midget."

"Fuck you!"

"You are, Frank, I’m just being honest."

"Pff, yeah, whatever, it’s not like you’re far taller than me."

"I might not be, but I’m more agile."

"Ha! that’s like saying Patrick’s more agile!"

"Hey, hey, don’t get me into your stupid arguments, leave me out of this madness." Patrick complained sleepily. He wasn’t quite sure about what were they arguing about, but his experience said that it meant trouble and he better not made part of it.

"Yeah, yeah, you wish you were as agile as he is." answered Pete cockily, and ignoring Patrick’s request.

"Yeah, again, I’d rather being out of this stupidity, thanks."

Gerard appeared after spending a kind of considerable time in the bathroom-though to one questioned it-, immediately, Mikey went there, mumbling an “I thought you were never going out” on his way.

"What are you guys ranting about?"

"Our friend Frank here, thinks he can reach the key in that shelf faster than Patrick can."

"Wow, that was not said, Peter!" complained Patrick, now kind of understanding the situation and feeling the right amount of fear he was supposed to.

"Well, it’s not like it wasn’t an implicit message, right?" replied Frank sounding pretty interested in that.

"I don’t think there’s need to question it, I bet Frankie can do it better." replied Gerard nonchalantly, getting a smiley “Thank you” from Frank.

"Hey! My Patrick can get there faster than your Frank!"

"Excuse me? When did I become “your Patrick”?"

"Shut it, property, I’m arguing with Gerard." 

Patrick just rolled his eyes to that. He didn’t want to be involved in that, he really didn’t. He just wanted to rest or sleep until they were able to go out of that room.

"I think I can do it faster, and save the day. I bet you’re hungry, aren’t you, Patrick?"

"Well, yeah, but how can you be sure that’s the key to the machine?"

"There’s just one way to know, Patrick" answered Pete as inviting him to be interested in the thing.

"No, actually there are two Ways, both Gerard and Mikey are tall enough to get the key." From the distance, they heard Mikey talking on the phone, probably trying to figure out what happened and if would be solved soon.

"Welp, my brother’s busy, aaand what if I don’t want to, Patrick?" answered Gerard crossing his arms and smiling as he saw Patrick’s surprised face on the dim light of the candle, opening his mouth but unable to say anything "what if I bet 20 bucks that Frank can get the key first?"

"Then keep your money bec-" begun Patrick who was immediately cut by an enthusiastic Pete that yelled.

"Deal! Fucking deal! 20 bucks on Patrick! Who’s with me?" he put the money on the table slamming loudly.

"STOP IT!" yelled Patrick a little fed up. The others turned to see him eyes wide open. It was sorta hard getting Patrick to be mad. He sighed heavily when he noticed his reaction might have been a little overdone. "Sorry," he said rubbing his temple "but I don’t wanna do this Pete, I really don’t. I’m tired, I’m hungry, I’m unathletic. Why don’t you do it yourself?"

"What?" said Pete making puppy eyes "Don’t you wanna help me earn 20 bucks? You’re my friend."

"Is this relationship based on how much money can I help you earn? Because you said that when you forced me into singing…"

"Hell, no, Patrick. It’s different this time. And I forced you into singing because your voice could cure cancer, and thanks to that we found Andy, and he’s a hella majestic drummer. Pweaseee?"

"Come on, Trick, we wanna prove a point, help a little." invited Gerard in a conciliatory tone.

"Geez, will it make you shut up?"

"Maybe, but if you win, I’m gonna repeat it to both Gee and Frank until one of us dies."

"Oh, god. Fine, I’ll do it."

"Yay! You’re the best!"

"Yeah, that’s to be proved. He has to be the taller, first."

"I’m not-"

"Yes! that’s what we gotta see first," interrupted Gerard.

"Guys, there’s no need, I’m the shortest person in this room."

"There’s no Mikey in this room."

"Does it make the difference, Gerard? He’d be the tallest, it makes no difference."

"Okay, now stand up, back against Frank’s."

"Pete, I don’t-"

"PATRICK MARTIN VAUGHN STUMPH, STAND UP RIGHT NOW!"

"Martin?" asked Gee.

"You didn’t now?" replied Joe playfully, finally intervening in the whole thing, with his classic idiotic smile.

"You using my middle name? That’s rude Lewis Kingston, seriously…" answered Patrick as he stood up and walked towards Frank.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Okay, now let’s see… they’re not that different, right?"

"Oh come on, I’m clearly taller."

"I think that closes the case…"

"Patrick, I don’t want any comment against this stupid bet, okay?" that led Patrick to sigh softly.

"Mmm, maybe it’s just half an inch, but Frank is actually taller."

"Ha!" stated Frank euphorically turning to see Patrick, and then pointing at him "I told you."

"Actually, I told you all first…"

"Shut it, Property Martin, now you both have to try and get the key."

Patrick mumbled “Property Matin” softly as he shook his head and walked towards the counter where the infamous key laid. Frank stood striking a fighting pose.

"Okay, now, it’s simple, I count to three and you try to get the key, whoever gets it first, makes someone the creditor of the money placed here" said Gerard pointing at the table.

"And! they have to only use the extension of their bodies, that’s what the bet is about, no standing on things, no using the counter to reach higher…"

"Can we jump?" asked Frank.

"Uh, yeah, I guess, we discussed the agility earlier."

"Pete, what if I don’t have good poise? I’ll need to hold the counter so I won’t fall." complained Patrick. He was NOT into it.

"Bullshit! I said you were agile!"

"And I said I’m not athletic!"

"Pff, okay, let’s grant him that, Gerard, we don’t want anyone to get hurt, especially my dear Stumpy."

"Then that’s it about the rules, who else wants to bet on them?"

"I pass."

"Aw, come on, Andy! Party pooper."

"Seriously, I still want to be on Patrick’s good side, you know?"

"Hey, I proposed the bet and I’m on Patrick’s good side, right Stumpy?" he said grinning. Patrick turned to see him with a 'really?' look on his eyes, but then shook his head and smiled. That guy was an idiot, but his friend after all.

"Okay, anyone else?"

"I pass." replied Joe.

"Why?"

"I just pass, I don’t feel like betting anything now, perhaps tomorrow, if you bet something stupid tomorrow, I’m on it."

"O...kay" said Gerard, Joe was a weird guy, when you thought about it. "Ray, you up to it?"

"Uhh, no, I don’t think so."

"Come on, Raymond! You don’t trust me?"

"No, I just don’t think it’s alright, see, Patrick’s not comfortable with it."

"Now you say it? I needed backups five minutes ago, dude!" Ray just raised his shoulders and Patrick sighed. He was thinking that whenever Pete came up with some stupid idea, he’d sigh more than any other day of his life.

"How about Mikey-?" begun Gerard, but Patrick interrupted.

"Do you want to prove your freaking point or what?"

"Hey! Easy peasy, Martini. Then it’s just Pete and I. Cool enough, right?"

"Yup, cool enough."

"Then that’s it, 3.. 2… 1… GO!" 

Frank begun hoping and trying to reach for the key as if he was a toddler. Patrick just tiptoed and stretched his arm as much as possible.

"Patrick! You’re not even trying!"

"I told you I didn’t want to-"

"Shut it, focus on the goal, and try harder."

"Holy smokes! Who are you? My P.E. teacher from middle school?"

"I said shut it!" 

In that moment, an “Okay, talk to you later” was heard in the next room, followed by some quiet footsteps. Mikey came in and raised an eyebrow to the scene displaying in front of him.

"What am I missing?" he asked Ray in a whisper.

"Patrick and Frank are trying to get a key that’s on the top shelf."

"Oh," he said and then walked towards the counter, "you could have asked for help, you know?" he said reaching to the key and holding it in his fingers, but as soon as he did it, Gerard and Pete stopped him.

"DON’T!" that monosyllable was said in such a high volume, Mikey almost drops the key.

"Put that back right now!"

"But what-?"

"That’s a bet, dude. We want to see who can reach it first!" Mikey turned to see Frank, to his right, he looked like a kid whose candy got stolen. Then Patrick, to his left, who looked like a dog under the rain.

"Now put the key back there, Michael James."

Mikey opened his eyes wide and slowly put the key where it belonged, put his hands in the air like he was being arrested and took a place next to Ray. 

"Mikes…" said Patrick with a very long 'I'

"He’s my big brother, used my middle name… I don’t wanna die yet, you know?" Patrick sighed, for the thousandth time in the afternoon.

"Now get back to business, Lunchbox, or Frank’s gonna win."

"Wow, they haven’t called me that in so long… just a question, Mikey. Is there any clue that that key actually belongs to a vending machine?"

"Uh, yup, the keyring said 'Vending Machine', so I suppose it does."

"Excellent! Now you have something to fight for, right, buddy?" replied Pete full of energy.

"Well, at least I know I’m not doing this for nothing."

"Dude, my 20 bucks."

"Do you seriously think I’ll be able to earn you that money, Pete?" he said stretching his arm as much as he could, trying not to get hit by jumping Frank.

"Of course I do! I have much faith in you, or else I wouldn’t have said what I said."

"Wow, your faith in me costs 20 dollars, I’m flattered." replied Patrick monotonously.

"Wait, it wasn’t me who set the price, it was Gerard!"

"Woah, now leave me out of your bromance fights, okay?"

"Shut up!"

"Is that the only think you can do, Pete? Shut people up?"

"No, I play the bass terribly, put my friends into torture, and can scream like a dying animal."

"What kind of people am I working with?" wondered Gerard out loud, playing his drama queen the best he could. 

The word “bromance” gave Patrick an idea. It was very stupid if you sit down and consider it, but Patrick hadn’t eaten and was tired, he was not in the mindset of considering things too much.

"Pete…"

"Get back to business, Patrick."

"If you stop this madness already, I’m gonna give you 20 bucks…"

"Not interested-"

"And," he paused for a moment and then let out "I’ll let you hug me in the next concert." 

Pete was speechless. Everyone was. Even Frank stopped jumping and turned to see him like he was the craziest man on Earth.

"Like, really?"

"Yes, I won’t push you away, and I’ll let you hug me whenever you want, deal?" Pete bit his lips and stared at the table. Of course he wanted to hug Patrick without restrictions, he liked making him feel awkward and he was chubby and fluffy, he was a great guy to hug.

"I need to prove a point here, Trick." He said with puppy eyes. Patrick’s face fell, and they all laughed at him. His fuckin’ last resource had been useless.

"Oh boy," said Joe, "your dignity’s gone in like a hundred different ways.

"Okay, we’ll keep this going. But I won’t let you hug me for... like… 50 concerts, okay? You don’t even approach me!"

"Geez, Trick, you’re really harsh on me."

"Some of you get the key already, hunger is making us delusional." replied Gerard, tired of waiting for Frank to get the key. Because, it was his Frankie who was gonna get it, right?

Fed up of the whole situation, Patrick decided to jump, he hit something with his fingers and he almost stumbled to the ground. But there it was, the infamous key on his hands, wrapped in his fingers like it was the meaning of life or something. The room fell on a dead silence that was only interrupted by the cars passing by outside.

"I did it…" Patrick whispered to himself. For some reason, he felt really happy about it, he felt like it had been a great success or something. Maybe because it meant the torture was over and he could sit back at the table and sleep.

"HE DID IT! OH MY GOD! I KNEW HE WOULD! I KNEW IT! I TOLD YOU WAY! FUCK YEEEAAAAAHHH!!!!" 

Pete started pointing at everyone and laughing like a maniac. Frank and Gee looked kinda disappointed. Mikey was confused as fuck. Ray and Andy nodded and Joe just smiled stupidly like he had done for the entire afternoon. He was a very weird guy.

"You are the bestest!" said Pete as he wrapped his arms tight around Patrick’s body.

"I said no hugs, Pete…"

"This is not a concert, Trick. Oh boy, that’s why I love you!"

"Wow, I didn’t know your love for me was based on my ability to reach things out of ridiculously high shelves."

"Aw, come on, I love you because you’re the bestest. Now, you saved the day, let’s get some of that junk food." he said getting the key from Patrick’s tired fingers.

"Oh, guys, I forgot to tell you," begun Mikey when they opened the stupid vending machine at last, "I was speaking on the phone and-"

"Yeah, we noticed that" Ray pointed out.

"Silence, Raymond. Where was I? Ah, yeah, I was on the phone with our manager, he said that there was a shortcut in the energy station, the problem won’t be solved until tomorrow morning or something."

"Oh man!" complained Joe, letting his smile down for the first time in the whole while.

"Well, at least we got food, thanks to Patrick." said Frank warmly.

"It could have been easier, though, but yeah, you’re welcome."

"Oh, Trick, my dear Trick, why make it easy when you can make it funny?"

 

**_THE END_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, yeah, it begun as a very simple bet and suddenly I just couldn't stop writing, I never thought it could be so long, but I'm pretty happy with the way it turned out.  
> Hope you like it and comment letting me know what you think, and if you found it funny :v  
> Thanks for reading.
> 
> *If you want to know how the series works, read part 1 "Prologue" ;)*


	2. FAST

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when you mix two guinea pigs, a group of idiots, a sleepy guy, and a vegan in a small shared dorm room?  
> Mikey and Joe are about to put their pets' abilities to test for the sake of the punch-line to this lame joke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In loving memory of the dollar bill eaten by the guinea pig Mawrk, may you rest in peace...

"Where the fuck is Mikey?" complained Joe as he pet the small ball of fur in his hands.

"Ugh, I hate it that he's always late"

They had planned it the day before, just when Mikey randomly told Joe about his and Kristen's new purchase. She wanted a guinea pig, she'd had them all her life and just loved those rodents. Mikey was okay with it. It represented something of  _their_ own, since they still couldn't live together. Joe had decided to stay single (unless he found the right person) and become Crazy-Animal-Guy. He didn't want to be the classic Cat-person, so he took some time to consider which animal could be the best. Guinea pigs won the battle and he decided to go with them. He'd already bought two. He had a room of his own so he could do anything he wanted without bothering anyone. Some called him 'Lucky Bastard' because of that, himself included.

In a very weird exchange of comments about the abilities of the guinea pigs, the "Well, yeah, but the younger ones must be faster than the older ones" line came up, and the guys couldn't help but to prove the other one wrong. Joe's guinea pigs being the older ones, had to prove the experience that came with age; and Mikey's being the younger, had to prove the energy of youth.

The price wasn't set yet, but Joe imagined it would be like horse-racing, everyone making their own bet to the winner. The whole crew was invited and they were very excited. Not everyone, though: Patrick didn't know why everyone had come to his room while he was trying to take a nap, and Andy got mad at them when heard of their purposes of using animals in such a way. However, none of them could escape the room, as the other guys had locked the room and were being very childish about it: they didn't want anyone else to know what they were doing until the winner was crowned and they could be very proud about it.

Suddenly, someone knocked at the door. As Frank hurried to open the door, hoping it would be Mikey at last, Andy stood up and tried to go out, but Pete grabbed him by the arm and he couldn't move anymore. He sent Pete a death glare, but the black hair guy pulled him harder and made him go away from the door. Andy sat back on Patrick's bunk and looked with consideration at the poor blond trapped in his own bedroom and already given up on taking his nap.

"Hey guys"

"Oh, wrong Way" said Frank with disappointment.

"Are you really surprised that my stupid brother is still not here?"

"No, not really"

"Just that he's here," said Mikey behind Gerard with a blank expression on his face and a little cage in his hands.

"Oh, hey Mikes!" said Pete faking his enthusiasm.

"Hi. So, you complain about my being late when you were just seconds before me?"

"Well, you were the one who planned the whole race thing, right? You were supposed to be here before anyone else. I thought I'd be here to see the winner's crowning or something...

"STOP THE PETA AGENT!" yelled Joe when he saw Andy stand up to get to the door and escape from the event.

"FUCK MIKEY, CLOSE THE DAMNED DOOR!!" replied Frank as he pulled Andy back in. The tattoo covered guy groaned as he pulled his arm out of Frank's hold.

"Seriously, you should let me go, I ain't telling anyone, I just don't want to be here to witness this... Don't say a word Pete, you don't need my testimony to say who won, that's what you got Frank for. Shit, guys, let me go, I just don't like seeing things like that...

"Aw, come on Andrew, we ain't hurting the little beasts, they just have to run, as they do everyday."

"Not funny."

"Yes it is."

"No..."

"Okay," Patrick chimed in, "can anyone please tell me what the fuck is going on, what 'beasts' are you talikng about, and why did you call Andy 'PETA Agent'?"

"Oh, god, Patrick, you woke up to that explanation"

"No, I woke up to Pete laughing histerically and calling Mikey 'stupid'"

"Well, fuck you, Pete" reacted Mikey.

"I don't see why you get mad at Pete, you called yourself stupid when you came in," said Gerard mockingly.

"I hate you" said Mikey when he realised that he had, in fact, called himself stupid.

"It's really simple, Pat"

"Don't call me that, Pete!" he said warningly.

"Jeez, what a had temper... Okay, so PatRICK, Joe and Mikey are racing their guinea pigs to see if the youngest ones are faster 'cause they're young, or if the oldest ones are better 'cause of their experience."

Patrick's face expressed confusion in the purest of its states. He blinked blankly at Pete and held his glare with his mouth wide open. When he finally found the words, he said

"What the fuck?"

"Ha, that's a classic answer, isn't it?" said Joe with a silly smile on his face.

"No, seriously, what the fuck? You had to do the race  _here?_ Why couldn't you go to Joe's bedroom?"

"Oh, that what bothers you, Patrick?"

"Yes, Andy, that's it. I've been up for the last three nights writing essays and studying for my exams, I needed some peace to sleep, and these freaks come here and go all noisy."

"Aw, come on, Trick, it's also my bedroom," said Pete childishly.

"Well, that's unfortunate" answered Patrick.

"Hey, it'll be fun"

"No, it won't. Go to Joe's bedroom, it's free"

"I don't want people in my bedroom"

"Neither do I!"

"Aw, come on, Trick," said Pete as he stood and sat down next to him. He wrapped his arms around Patrick and pulled him to his lap "there you go, sleep."

"Get of off me!!" he yelled as he struggled to come off of Pete's grip, but it was useless.

"Nope, take your freaking nap, and let us have our race"

"Patrick, offering resistance is pointless, accept it." Suggested Gerard. Feeling defeated, Patrick stopped fighting and sighed heavily. He made himself as comfortable as he could in that position and closed his eyes.

"Just one thing, Wentz"

"Tell me"

"Don't dare you touching my sideburns, or I'll finish you"

"But..."

"Don't."

"So," interfered Ray with a smile, "can I infer from that that he's done it before?"

"Just for the record, Raymond, I finished him that time as well"

"Okay, enough bromance, get the racers on."

With Andy's soft groan as background, they set the little racing track and set the animals on the starting line.

"Okay, let's make the bet chart, what's you guinea pig's name, Joe?"

"Mr. Fluffy Pants"

"Pfft, seriously, Joe? That's a ridiculous name!" bursted Frank and then started laughing.

"It's a guinea pig, the name's okay. What did you expect, a serious name? A human name? Oh, let me tell you, if I ever have a pig I'll name him Frank."

"Hum, it's not like I'm the only Frank on Earth, you know?"

"Okay, then I'm gonna name him Frank Eyeroh."

"Iero!"

"Yeah that, there won't be any confusion that way, right?" Frank huffed and sat down.

"Okay, now Mikey"

"It's Cupcake"

"Well, that's better than Puffy Pants."

"It's Fluffy, and they're on the same level, they're freaking rodents"

"Yeah, you wish they were," replied Mikey.

"Well, if they're not, then I bet mine's better..."

"Yeah, that's why we are here"

"No, I'm talking 'bout the name, I bet my pet's name's better"

"Okay, so before the actual race, let's see which name's better. Raise your hands for..."

"Wait! Hey, Patrick, Patrick, wake up!"

Patrick didn't move. Pete rubbed his shoulder again, but he didn't react.

"Jeez, he's in coma," said Mikey.

"Well, he's a little hard to wake up, that's true" answered Pete and rubbed his shoulder again, "hey, boy! Wake up!"

Patrick mumbled something and groaned softly. Then Gerard proposed to put one of the guinea pigs on his face, but Andy opposed firmly arguing that if Patrick tried to shrug it of he might hurt it. So Joe suggested an idea that made Pete open his eyes and shake his head.

"I'm not touching his sideburns, he DID finish me the last time I did it. Plus, I don't want him to get mad at me."

"Fuck, we won't have all the votes" complained Mikey.

"Guys, he won't even be interested in voting" stated Andy in a bored tone, why couldn't they understand that they were not into it?

"Oh, shut up, Hurley, it's just about the freaking name"

"You..."

"PATRICK!!" yelled Frank pretty close to him and everyone jumped.

The blond moved violently and sat straight, he rubbed his eyes while trying to catch his breath again, his face was wrinkled in a frown and looked really upset. Pete stroke his hair apologetically and as if he was waiting for the worst. When he finally opened his eyes, he fixated them on Frank furiously.

"Hey Sleeping Beauty, which name is better for a guinea pig: Cupcake or Fluffy Pants?"

"You fucking woke me up like this for that?" he groaned between his teeth. He looked like he'd hurt someone pretty bad. He looked at everyone in the room with anger and shrugged Pete's hand of his head, "You, you bunch of idiots, you're sick! Get the fuck outta here, or do your stupid race in silence, but just let me sleep! Fuck!" he pushed Pete off the bunk and wrapped himself in his blankets. Pete had a hurt expression on his face and slapped Frank softly.

"Ouch!"

"You idiot..."

"Okay, enough of that, I guess we'll have to count only five votes..." said Gerard..

"Four" replied Andy dryly.

"But..."

"Four, I said."

In the end, there were three votes for "Cupcake" and one for "Mr. Fluffy Pants", and though Mikey shrugged it on his face, Joe said it was a minor defeat, compared to the actual race.

So, with the animals on the track, Gerard started writing how much each guy was betting on each creature, and Ray started placing his bills on the table, so all of them did the same. They weren't even trying to be quiet, as if they had forgotten what Patrick had said. Suddenly, there was a knocking in the door, it was kinda  soft, so they didn't hear it, but it grew louder until it was a banging and the guys stopped. Making sure Andy wouldn't take the chance to escape, Gerard got the door and opened enough room just to have a glimpse of whomever was on the other side. He stopped a little when he saw the person standing in front of him, then smiled awkwardly and greeted her.

"Hey, Kristin, how's everything, what brings you here?"

To the sound of her name, the guys looked at each other with surprise and a little bit of fear, Mikey grew pale and tried to come out unnoticed. For some reason, they all shut up, and tried not to move a muscle, as if they weren't just laughing out loud and yelling at each other, as if they'd disappeared. All of them fixated their eyes on the door, Frank whispered something, but Ray shut him up, still glancing at Gerard's back. The short guy tried to move, but the afro one stopped him.

"Oh, fine, I guess," replied the girl "just that Mikey isn't taking my calls and I can't find Cupcake,"

"Guys..." whispered Frank again, and Ray shushed him a second time, "but Ray..."

"Silence, dwarf!" whispered Ray with a bit of anger.

"Really?" said Gerard in a fake-surprise tone and Mikey rolled his eyes, the idiot simply gave out he knew something.

"Yeah, I asked him if I could pick it up later, and he said it was okay, but when I went to his room, it wasn't there,"

"Guys, listen!" said Frank under his breath, but so desperately, the other guys were really stupid not to turn to his direction and notice something was wrong.

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah, someone told me they'd seen him coming in here, is he inside?" she said a little more suspisciously, then Gee felt blank about what to answer, his stupid little brother hadn't told him any of that.

"Well, you see..." to that point, Frank had lost his patience, the shit happening in front of him was big, just that nobody heard him, unless...

"Andy!" the vegan turned around and couldn't help himself.

"SHIT!" he said too loud for the other guys' liking, but when he approached the table everyone turned around and found out that one of the animals was eating the bills for the bet.

"MR. FLUFFY PANTS, DON'T!" yelled Joe as he jumped to put the bill out of his pet's jaws. Unluckily, he could only rescue an inch of the paper.

With that, Kristin pushed the door and walked past Gerard. Although she couldn't say "What the fuck?!", her face was pretty eloquent.

"Hi, darling..." said Mikey in that very tone you use when you get caught racing your rodent pet, and betting on it with your stupid friends.

"Mikey, what... what is this?" since he simply couldn't lie to her, he said

"We were racing the guinea pigs to see which one was fastest..."

"Oh my God, how old are you, five?!" she got closer to the table and picked both the little cage and Cupcake. She put the animal inside and stood straight, "I think I'll keep her from now on, okay?" Mikey nodded, it was one of his two options: To nod, or to agree.

She walked out the room and left a group of confused boys behind. Taking advantage of the situation, Andy finally could escape the sort of prison where he had been trapped to witness how big his friends' stupidity could be.

"Fuck, Joe, your guinea pig is a big loser, isn't he?"

"Oh, shut up, Frank, you hurt his feelings"

"But he IS a loser, he's got a stupid name and he ate the money, he's a loser, no race needed to see that"

"Well, and now how do we know whose money he ate?"

"Well, I can recognize my bills" begun Gerard, and soon they all joined, arguing why those bills where theirs.

"Well," said a new voice that hadn't been heard in a while. None of them had seen Patrick stand up from his bed and grab a big and heavy looking book off his desk. His hair was messy and his eyes were narrowed, he was smiling, but he kind of looked like a psychopath, "well, well, guys, I've had enough of you, so I'll kindly ask you to leave this room and solve your money issues somewhere else, shall you?"

"Aw, come on Trick," begun Frank, "we just..."

"GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!!!" he said slamming the book against the desk, they froze in their places and he turned to see them with fire in his eyes, which ironically made them sweat cold. He lifted the book again and turned his body towards them. Taking the hint, Ray and Mikey started to pick everything up, Joe grabbed Mr. Fluffy Pants and stood up, then they all rushed to the door.

"Wentz..."

"But Patrick, this is also my room..."

"Out..."

"Yes, sir."

With that, he stood up and left, following the rest of the guys to Joe's room. There they solved the money thing and sat around in silence.

"Agh," groaned Frank "all of this was for nothing"

"Not really," replied Mikey "you bet on my pet's name"

"Well, yeah, but we put no money for that"

"Then let's do it" said Gee, "let's make it worth, at least a little"

After Ray payed Gee, Frank and Pete two dollars each for Mikey's pet's name, he said

"Well, Joe, hope you're proud of yourself, I'm broke because of you"

 "You could have always voted for Mikey's name"

"But I think your pet looks like Fluffy Pants, I think it's actually a cool name for this kind of animal. But that's not my point, Mr. Chewey Pants ate MY money, you have to pay up."

"Oh, dude, one of the main reasons I did this is because I'm also broke, I took the risk to see if I could earn something."

"Man, you didn't! You're using an animal to fill your pockets, you don't deserve living, I'll sue you," said Pete mockingly.

"Ha, that sounds familiar. But honestly, I'd rather having Andy giving me up to Animal Police than being attacked by Patrick with a book twice his size." They all laughed to Joe's comment and Mikey said

"But really, I don't see what's his freaking problem, he sleeps like a freaking rock."

"I know, right! He's a crybaby, the sucker was practically in coma..." agreed Frank.

"Hey, don't be too harsh on the little man."

"Why do you say that, Wentz, do you like him or something?"

"I don't, I just know the creature had a stressful week, he did need some peace and quiet."

"Yeah, yeah, I bet that if we go back to that bedroom and go all noisy he _won't_ wake up"

"Hm, sounds interesting, Frank," replied Mikey, "who's in?"

"No more bets for me, thank you" said Raymond in a bored tone.

"Yeah, I don't feel like betting now," agreed Gerard.

"You're not stupid enough to think I'll let you into that room, are you?"

They sighed because the knew they wouldn't be allowed in the room to have fun at the blondie's expense.

"Whatever. Well, I guess Fluffy Pants's just not the racing kind. Anyway, I'm not racing animals ever again, it's not my thing."

 

THE END

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I thought I'd never be able to finish writing this, but here it is, for you to enjoy it. I'm not done with this, I lack couple things, but I'm moving and I don't have my computer at hand, thus someone lended me the slowest most nerve wrecking tablet you could think of, and I'm sick of working on it, so wait for the updated version with everything that's required. (Did I mention it's incredibly late and I'm fighting to keep my eyes open?) Anyways, of you're reading this, know I'll love you, even if I don't feel my fingers anymore :)
> 
> UPDATE!! (I told you this thing was lacking someting, well, here it is)  
> http://vivzmind.deviantart.com/art/Zoophobia-5-8-10-163350460 This was really the first thing I though about when you talked about small animals racing. I can picture them all doing that. (I highly recommend the comic where these characters come from :P)
> 
> *If you want to know how the series works, check part 1 "Prologue" ;)*


	3. LOUD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pete Wentz is childish. Well, so am I, and that's basically how our relationship works. However he can also be one kinky bastard, and he's cruel when ploting his revenge against one of my pranks. This is the story of how I got in this awkward situation with Patrick...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, loyal to my schedule, I took forever to write this :v  
> But seriously, it was sort of hard to imagine, and that's why it took so long(and... goodnight? :v) However I started typing like crazy and this came out, and I finally have time to post it, so here you go. It also came out longer than I expected, it's actually the longest chapter of this, so I think it's worth the wait :P
> 
> The plot for this one was suggested by The_Nerd_Extremist. Thnks s mch fr th idea, it was extremely hard to write, but the situations that led to it were fun to imagine :)
> 
> *If you're not really fond of smut, don't read this, or at least not complete, 'cuz there's some plot before and after that which you might find fun. You can stop reading when she starts talking to Patrick, and resume when they wake up; you'll miss the situation that gives the title, but meh, it doesn't really matter.
> 
> So, enough ranting, le chapter:

Okay, before making the stupid thing I'm about to do, I have to remind myself how I ended up here, it's the last chance to think this through, and although I was almost totally sure about it, there's still this little doubt hanging in my chest telling me to back away. However, my stupid ego is stronger, and it's been telling me that I can't lose to Pete, that sucker has seen my power before, and he's gonna see it again.

The thing is that this is not the way I wanted to approach Patrick about this topic, and I had always imagined a much more romantic way of confessing my stupid crush on him, this crush that had me putting up with his freaky friends, studying my ass up as sound technician so they would take me with them on tours. I know I sound pretty sick, but if you had a guy like Patrick in front of you, you’d do exactly the same, so don’t judge.

Either way, even when he doesn't seem to mind that I asked him to share his bed tonight, I’m freaking out, because I have to say some really stupid things to prove Pete he can’t beat me. Why am I so down on my luck? Come on Danna, go through the story, just one more time…

It was 9am, and we’d just arrived to the hotel after a long ass night trip across the state, which for some reason I spent looking at Patrick sleeping, he’s so cute, like, he looks so peaceful and… focus, dude, focus. Either way, this made me grow really tired and I could barely keep my eyes open. Patrick was fresh and radiant, well, the other guys were as well, but I didn’t care about them, until Pete said he’d take a nap before having lunch and going to the arena to make the soundcheck and stuff for the show.

See, my relationship with Pete is what you’d call without a hint of a doubt immature, childish and… well, immature, there’s really nothing more to it. Yesterday he’d done this not so funny thing that involved my burger for lunch and an unhealthy amount of hot sauce, he had to pay.

“Just wake me up when lunchtime comes, okay?”

“Set a freaking alarm, weirdo” I told him, and the other guys chuckled along.

“I’m not talking to you, Microphone. So guys, just call me or something.”

With that, he grabbed his key and got into his room. I took mental note that the door opened to the inside. Come to think of it, every door does, so I don’t know what made it so “new” in that moment, perhaps my lack of sleep? However, it was a very important fact to know. Anything around Pete that could involve a prank was an important fact to know. So I laid on my own bed thinking of a good plan to get back to Pete, and I off course set an alarm to wake me in the next hour, I needed time to plan my prank and I had to seize every second. Due to my long night awake, the second I covered my wrecked body with the duvet, I unplugged myself from reality and if I had any dreams, I don’t remember them. You can now imagine how tired I was.

When the hideous sound went off, I jumped and had the closest thing to a heart attack I’d experienced so far. And that opened my eyes to an awesome idea: I’d make Pete soil his freaking pants, and I knew exactly how to make it even funnier.

I quickly put my shoes on and stood in front of Pete’s door, I heard him snoring softly and smiled to the fact he was still in his bedroom and sound asleep. I went out and looked for my supplies in the bus. Then I got the insulating tape for the cables and went back to his door. I checked my surroundings to make sure no one would interrupt my master plan. I taped strands of the tape across the door, right up the height where it’d take his face and his waist. Then I waited for thirty minutes, and believe me when I say they were the longest thirty minutes of my life (well, before that night...), because I wanted him to feel as though he’d had a long time sleeping, or else my story would be ruined.

Then I finally went through my phone and dialed his number. Those thirty minutes were enough to prepare my speech, and think of the best way to sound as desperate as needed. He had to believe it, or else, he would ruin the plan. As soon as he got the call, I took a deep breath.

"PETE!!" I almost yelled into the phone.

"What the fuck?" He replied sleepily.

"You finally pick up! We've been calling you like crazy, we knocked at your door but you wouldn't answer. We're about to go for lunch, and if you don't go out know, we'll run late!"

"For real?" He said a little more awake and as scared as I wanted it.

"Yes! Hurry up! Come on!"

I heard some ruffling right after he hung up. I really can't believe that he bought that stupid story, I wouldn't have, guess I overestimated him.

When I heard his rushed steps approaching, I stood in front of the door with my little personal camera ready. Everyone would see this, and it'd go down in history. This was gonna be one of his most embarrassing photos, after the dick pic, that everyday I regret having seen. This was gonna be far more modest, but far funnier. And there he was! Running into the tape with a scared expression on his face, and then closing his eyes in the funniest way.

"SMITH!!" He yelled as he tried to remove the tape glued to his forehead, just a little lower and it would have been his eyes. Gotta keep that in mind, just in case.

It was really hard for me to keep the camera steady while laughing.

"I bet this is really funny, yeah, scare the livin' shit out of Pete, gosh, you're having a blast, I imagine..."

"I can't believe you bought it!"

"Yeah, I guess I should have known better than to believe something coming from your mouth, freak." he replied as he removed the remaining tape off his body and made a little ball with it, which he immediately tossed at me.

"Come on, Wentz, you gotta admit it was genius."

"Yeah, turn that camera off first."

"No fucking way, not until you admit it..."

"And you shut it off immediately."

"Okay."

"Hmm, I won't believe it until I see it."

"Gosh  you're such a crybaby, you can check later, alright?"

"Alright. This was a good plan, I hate to admit it, but I wish I would have come up with it, good move, Microphone…"

"Oh," I said feeling quite flattered, "that was more than I bargained for, bro."

"Yeah, whatever, now turn that thing off."

I do as I'm told with a really stupid grin on my face.

"Now, speaking 'bout admitting things…" he said in a sort of cryptical tone, and I put my guard up immediately, not that it had been actually down, I'm not that stupid, "there's this undying love someone hasn't confessed yet…" he stared right into my eyes smiling like a freaking maniac.

"What…? Do you like me? Well, sorry, dude, 'cuz I'm not interested at all…"

"And that's exactly what I'm talking about, you can't be interested in me, just like I can't be interested in you, you simply use far too much hot sauce, ew."

"That was you fault, freak."

"Yeah, yeah, but I know you're not interested in me because you're obsessed with Patrick, that's not healthy, you know?"

I open my mouth as to say something, but I can't, am I really that obvious that even the oblivious weirdo has noticed?

"No, don't even try to deny it, even Marcus has noticed, apparently the only one who still doesn't know is the victim in question."

"Don't call him that!… shit Wentz don't look at me like that!" I hate it when he smiles that way, if I didn't knew him, I'd find him cuter. That smile is creepy as heck, though…

"Well, whatever, I bet there are lots of things you'd like to do to him…" he stated wiggling his eyebrows in a freaky way.

"What the fuck, Wentz?"

"Oh, don't tell me you don't think about that."

"I don't, you're the only one who thinks about that, perv."

"Pfff, yeah, sure, I bet you always think about kissing hin, and touching him, and ripping his clothes, and…"

"Woah, buddy, I don't care about your bandmates fantasies "

"Those are your fantasies, darling, it's in your eyes, you want to sleep with him, do dirty things…"

"Hold a sec, you think of me having sex with Patrick? You have problems dude, seriously"

"Enough. So, are you gonna tell him?"

"What?! No! You insane?" I sounded like something between a whisper and a scream, it made me feel kind of stupid, because we've been talking pretty loud, maybe the whole floor already knows about my crush and Pete's sick fantasies.

"Why not? You've known each other for enough time, I don't think it'll even be awkward."

"Off course it would, you weirdo. I'm his friend, I don't wanna ruin that, and I fear being rejected," I confess feeling dumb. I feel a little vulnerable saying such a thing to him, but in a twisted way, he's still my friend, it's not like we actually hate each other, we're just five-year-olds when we're together.

"Well, even if that's the case you know he's gonna be super polite when rejecting you, don't worry."

"Wow, that helped a lot, dude…"

"You're welcome. But honestly, you just have to do it, don't interrupt me, you don't mean to tell me you're brave enough to pull these stupid pranks on me but you can't talk to the most harmless guy we know?"

I take a breath and try to say something, but I can't. He's got a point, but that little comment hurt my ego, and now my blood is boiling. Brave enough? I'm gonna show you brave enough.

"I can do it." I say regretting it instantly. Fuck my big mouth.

"Nah, you already told me you can't, you're afraid."

"I'm not, I'll do it."

"Alright, then let's make it interesting. You'll have to do it in a sexy way, not like I think you can be slightly sexy, but you can try…"

"What the fuck do you have in mind?"

"You're gonna tell him that you like him, and also, that you'd like to do things with him…"

"That's sick. No, I'm not doing it, I don't wanna come out as a perv."

"Oh, that sounds like an interesting challenge: tell him that, but trying not to sound like a perv, what do you think?"

"Gross."

"Awww, someone can't face a challenge! Chicken!" Then he started making chicken sounds and looking ridiculous, I know I should have said something, but I was too hurt to do so.

"And if I agree, what?"

"If he sleeps with you…"

"No shit, no. This is not about if he'll like me back, this is only about if I can do it or not."

"God, don't cry. Okay, if he sleeps with you it means that a) you did it and b) the friendship won't be ruined, just transformed. So if that happens, you win, and I won't play pranks on you for a month."

I was speechless at that point, seriously? That sounded tempting, but I didn't want to play with Patrick that way.

"And if he doesn't?"

"I'll asume you didn't do it and you won't be able to play pranks on me for one month as well."

"Let's say I do it and he rejects me, then what?"

"Uhm, let's keep that neutral, I don't know what to do about the little dude's feelings."

"Oh, now you think about his feelings…"

"Hey, I always do! Imagine that he does like you back, then he'll be with you and you'll be together and you both would happy and corny and stuff. I think he'd be happy if he had a girlfriend."

I sigh and think for a while. This is pretty sick, and it's tempting at the same time. I really don't want to play with Patrick, but if things work…

"… deal…"

"Sure?"

"Yes Wentz, don't mess around, shake hands?"

He shakes my hand with that creepy smile and I think of a very important detail.

"And how am I supposed to do that?"

"I don't know, ask him to share the same bed or something, get creative." He said before turning around and going back to his bedroom. I stood in that hall for a longer while wondering how I got myself into this. What had I gotten myself into?

The plan for the night after the concert was staying at the same hotel and leaving around eight in the morning. During the concert and while Patrick wasn't around, Pete kept giving me "ideas" on what to say, but I rejected all of them, have I told you he's one kinky bastard? Well, he is, and if I use any of his ideas, Patrick wouldn't even approach me again, I could get fired or something. It seemed like he had forgoten what the challenge was about, but even when I told him, he didn't stop.

Collecting the cables was the smallest of my worries when the concert was over, I spent the whole time thinking of an excuse to get in Patrick's bedroom. I had no time and no ideas left when we saw the hotel door and I had to get done with the challenge, so I came up with this:

"Uhm... Patrick?" I say when I see him standing in front of his door. It's now or never.

"Yes?" He replies with a soft tired smile.

"I... well, there was a problem with my bedroom and I can't stay there anymore," I say pointing at my luggage on the floor next to me, "so I was wondering if there would be any problem if I stayed with you tonight…" he looks at me for a little moment with a confused expression on his face, then he smiles.

"Alright, come in."

He opens the door and turns the light on. It's a room for just one person, and it is convenient for the challenge, but that makes it more awkward.

"Well, there's just one bed, I don't know how…"

"Oh, it's alright, I don't mind."

"Oh, okay. Well, you can change your clothes in the bathroom, I don't take too long, you can come out any time."

I nod and head to the bathroom thinking about how ironic it is, since the idea is to get him undressed or at least telling him that I want to do it.

"You ready?" I say still unsure of going out now, I think I gave him enough time, though.

"Yeah, come in." I take a deep breath before turning the knob and walking out of the little room that served me as shelter from what was to come.

As soon as he lays eyes on me, I regret putting these small pajamas on, I should have worn the huge sweat pants I brought in case of a cold night. This seemed like a good idea in the bathroom, given the nature of the challenge, but now I want to go back there and tell Patrick that I'm okay with sleping on the bathroom floor, now it seems pretty cozy…

"You can pick your side of the bed, I don't mind." He brings me back to reality and I stand like an idiot for a while before heading to the left side of the bed and sitting awkwardly waiting for him to come and lay, or something.

He turns the light off and then walks to the other side and takes his glasses off, gosh, I love to see him without his glasses and hat. He moves to put himself under the blankets, and I mechanically do the same, starting to feel claustrophobic for some reason. He turns his back and his body loosens up, letting me know that he’ll fall asleep pretty soon, and that I better get that shit done now.

So that brings me to the starting point of this madness, this is where I lay now, trying not to ruin that precious thing I call friendship with Patrick, with that beautiful man, how will he look at me from now on if I come out as a perv? If he stops talking to me after this, I’ll quit, I won’t live with the thickness in the air and feeling awkward and judged by that little gentleman. I sigh heavily and feel him turning his head softly to me.

“What’s wrong?” he whispers. It’s now or never.

“I’m just... thinking about you...” my throat closes and my mind goes blank, what was I gonna say?

“About me? How so?”

“I don’t know for sure, well, kind of, I...” I decide that it’s best to speak my heart out and see what happens… “actually, I think about you all the time, I think about hugging you and being really close to you...” I do something that makes my pulse race faster and I regret instantly, I put my hand on his shoulder. He then lays on his back and looks at me. I slowly pull my hand back, but he stops me.

"Do you?" he holds the tip of my finger and stares at me. I feel at a lost under those eyes, my mouth goes dry, so I just nod. Why is he staring at me like that? "For how long now?" 'Oh, just the first time I saw you, and when we started talking, it's been years now, you know?'

"Uhm, long time, and as we get to know each other I feel this grow deeper, each day I like you better," now, this is what I like for a romantic and cute like confession, sadly, I have to make it dirty.

This sort of makes me wanna quit, but if it works, I'll get to sleep with Patrick, and although I've said I feel like I'm playing with him, that's something I wanna do, and I'm starting to feel dizzy at how confusing and double-standard and contratictory my train of thoughts is. I don't understand this situation anymore and having this internal fight of "Sleep with him/Don't" isn't helping at all. I just unplug rational and move my hand further into touching him, and rub his shoulder.

"You're just so handsome..." I say out of nowhere and mentally slap my face because it didn't come out as hot or sexy like, at all. I hear him taking a breath as if he was gonna say something, but he doesn't and that's how I know I'm royally screwed. Nothing to lose now! I take a chance at not letting him say anything else and keep  my ranting going, "I literally feel like melting whenever you look at me, and I picture what it would be like to hug you real tight, but not like we always do, not like we were friends; there are so many ways I would like to touch you, but it doesn't fit what we got right now..." I crossed the line now, maybe it's not half as dirty as any of Pete's ideas (and honestly, I can't think of anything half as dirty as a product from his perverted head), but it's not something you'd say to anyone, let alone a gentleman you call "best friend". So as far the bet goes, I already did my part; the rest is in Patrick's hands, and I just hope he rejects me the polite way I expect him to. I actually have enough time to think all of this, he is deas silent and I don't know what to do, mentally kiss this friendship goodbye, I guess...

"That's... well, pretty specific, I guess..." 'Ha, specific? You and Pete have a very different ideas of specific, compared to what he'd say, this was absolutely vague". "Uhh... I..."

"Just a favor, don't say 'friend', that word would be painful right now."

"Would it?" he asks looking at me, and I can hardly look back at him, in this poor lighting I can decipher the expression in his eyes, I hope it's not disgust, but I wouldn't blame him.

"Okay, I won't say it," I nod and bite my lip, "because I wasn't going to say it anyway..." I lift my head and look at him with confusion, he looks back at me with somewhat of a smile. "See, this is not something I'd say to a girl; especially one like you, smart and disciplined; but you're very pretty, and I like being around you, it was a nice surprise having you here tonight, you know? Though I wouldn't take advantage of you..."

"Oh you won't", I say sounding a little too excited, and a little too idiotic as result.

"What? What does that mean?" he sounds confused and disappointed and I can almost forget what he just said, and the tone he used to say it.

"Didn't you hear what I just said?"

"Well, yeah, but I thought... I don't know, I can't take advantage of you asking me and..."

"Oh, shut up," I say feeling carefree and fearless, all those worries have vanished and now we can enjoy ourselves. I put one hand on his cheek and get closer to his face, his eyes open wide and I smile, 'cuz he doesn't stop me. I press my lips against his and my heart races when I feel him kissing back.

He puts his hand on the back of my head and deepens the kiss, I open my mouth and he wastes no time in filling it with his tongue, which causes us both to moan. It’s a real shame to stop, but when we do, it’s obvious we both really needed to breathe. I giggle, and he follows me, with that perfect smile of his. I kiss him again and slide my hand down his neck, then to his chest, at the same time, he wraps his hands around my waist and pulls closer.

"Baby" he whispers against my lips "darling, oh darling."

I don’t answer, not with words. I slide my hands down the sides of his body and place my fingertips under his shirt, I start to fold it slowly, at the pace of the kiss. He helps me pulling it up, and a rational thought leaks through the blurry ones, I realize it’s the first time I’ll see him shirtless; I guess he’s taken his shirt off backstage, but I’m not in the dressing rooms because first off, I’m a girl, and second, that’s not my place during shows, I’m in the sound controls; so yeah, I’ve never seen him shirtless before, and I’m nervous as fuck.

He motions to sit up in order to make the shirt removal easier, he pulls me away just to move. I kneel on the bed watching as he pulls the shirt up his head, and then putting it to a side. He’s so fucking gorgeous, I think I might be drooling any second now, ‘cuz god, is he pretty. He kneels in front of me and smiles while placing his hands on my waist, then pulls me closer to his body and I wrap my arms around his neck as we cut the distance between our mouths.

I start moving mine from his lips to his cheek, then his jaw, until I reach his neck and hear him moaning loudly, I slide to his shoulder and notice how his breathing goes harder with each second. Next thing I know, his hands are under my shirt going up my back. He caresses softly and slides them back down, when he reaches the end of my ridiculously small shirt, he starts to pull it up. Holy shit, I don’t have a bra on… well, of course I don’t, duh, who sleeps with a bra? They’re pretty uncomfortable. The point is that he already noticed, and is going to put my shirt off anyways… it’s weird, when I imagined my first time I thought the guy would have to remove it. Yes, it’s my first time because I’m a freaking geek and nobody wanted to date me either way, so what? Patrick won’t have to do it, though, it’s gonna be straight into seeing my skin, I’m nervous, but I embrace it because I’m already there.

He removes the shirt painfully slowly, but what amazes me is the look in his eyes: it’s pure awe, anxiety, expectation… when it’s finally off, I see his mouth and eyes wide open, and his chest going up and down heavily. It’s extremely flattering and exciting, because I’m not a classic american beauty: my breasts are not big, actually they’re barely even there; and my waist is not curvy and tiny, is more of a rectangular shape almost as broad as my hips, which are sort of decent sized; but he’s looking at me like I’m the first wonder in the World and I see more drops of sweat glittering his face. The smile tensing up his lips is more than I bargained for a reaction of him seeing me shirtless for the first time.

He pulls closer to me hesitantly, little by little as if he was hypnotized, and presses his lips against my shoulder. His moan is muffled by my body, but mine comes out loud and clear, and is followed by some more as he moves his lips lower into my chest, each kiss moistening the little spots trailing his way to my breast, and holy crap, this ain’t happening, he’s kissing my nipple I feel my head fall back, this sensation is too unreal. I’ve never felt so dirty yet so alive, nobody’s ever kissed me that way, and my nerves are burning out of pure electricity. Needless to say I expressed it with a loud sound, I really don’t know which one, a moan? roan? a straight up scream? I don’t know, but I feel my throat buzzing as well. We’re both panting so hard I can’t believe we still have enough oxygen in our system to function properly. He then changes the target of his kisses to my waist and my ribs, I rub his shoulders mimicking what he’s doing in my hips and thighs. He suddenly stops and I look at him, then he looks up at me with a face that could win a tenderness contest; he looks so genuinely embarrassed I forget that he just fucking kissed my breasts…

"Sorry, I… I don’t know…" I snort and say

"You don’t know what? It’s alright, honey." 'Is it?' he asks with his eyes, "it’s fine, what kind of situation are we in?"

"Yeah, you’re right, sorry…"

"Don’t apologize, honey, just keep going."

He stares at my hips for couple seconds and bites his lip, as if he was hesitating, he’s so cute it’s impossible to think that I’m about to sleep with him. He tucks his thumbs under my panties and we both shiver. I start giggling for no reason and he can’t stop himself either.

"Nervous?" he says between chuckles.

"Sort of," I snort again," but I’m fine.

  
He slides my shorts along with my panties and I try not to flinch. I take them off completely and feel weird being the only one fully naked, his face is unreadable but somehow I feel he’s more tense than I am. I move my shaky hands towards his shorts and pull them down slowly, I don’t wanna look weird and overly anxious -as I am inside-. Now I don’t know how I’m gonna look at him, this is gonna be awkward as heck; I decide to keep my eyes there, since I’m gonna see him either way. He’s hard, and I try not to overreact at the sight. I come back to reality when he moves to put them off completely. We look at each other’s eyes in complete awe, and I really like the feeling that time has stopped between us and it’s just about seeing us in a different way. However, I can’t help but to bring my hands back to his body, right on his hips, it feels amazing and his body reacts a little further. I kiss him softly, and with that, he puts his hands on my shoulders, brings me even closer to his body, making our skins touch. When I try to pull him down, he stops me.

"What?"

"Uh… I don’t know, I…"

"Come on, Trick, loosen up" I say with a smile.

"Are we really going to…"

"Well, yeah, if you want to, off course."

"Uh… I do…"

"So, loosen up."

"But…"

"What?" really, what’s holding him back so much? Oh, shit, yeah… "my purse." He looks at me with a questioning smile on his face, "I got them in case I got the chance to sleep with the most beautiful man on Earth…"

"You’d planned this in advance..."

"Uhhh" holy crap "sort of, I mean I like you and all, and it’s not like I look for that alone, you know? It’s…"

"I know you girl, go ahead" he assures with a smile and kisses me again.

I get off the bed and get the condom. He picks it from my fingers and brings it to his mouth to rip the package, and now it’s me the one to stop the action.

"Wait!"

"What?" he answers with concern.

"I…"  _feel stupid…_  "I want to… feel you first…"

"Oh, well… uhm… alright."

He bites his lip and looks at me, but he can’t hold it for long, his eyes start moving around. Meanwhile, I slide my hand slowly down his body and my heart accelerates even more as I get it closer. My fingertips reach the top of his dick and he gasps, shutting his eyes and turning his head to the side. His mouth falls open and he takes in short breaths as I work my fingers around him. It feels weird, to be honest, but it’s also very exciting and I like it, especially because it makes him moan sweetly. As I’m doing so, he gets closer to me and kisses me deeply, but a little awkwardly since the touch has a big effect on him, and he seems out of control, as in shock. I finally let him go, ‘cuz I don’t want him to come just yet, I mean, we have to sleep, I can’t ruin everything now.

I pull away enough to let him put the condom on and look at him biting my lip hard. Once he is done, he looks at me with anxiety, but he also seems unsure on what to do next. I put my hand on the back of his neck. Now, I’ve never seen Patrick with a girlfriend or anything, but I don’t know if this is his first time as well? This is gonna be awkward…

"This is my first time…" I saw out of nowhere.

"Mine too" he says immediately and his voice sounds full of nervousness. I giggle like an idiot because of the anxiety and he does the same.

I lay down slowly and I open my legs to give him space, he bends over me supporting his body on his knees and his hands on the sides on my body; I look up at him and the view is kinda weird, but adorable, so intimate and perfect.

"Danna…?"

"Yes?"

"Can I… fuck, this… uh…"

"What?" does he wanna quit? fuck this shit…

"Can I… jeez I might sound like a pig… can I… feel you too?" I look at him for a second feeling hungry for something really dirty. _Yes baby, be like a fucking pig right now, I want you._

"Yeah…" I let out in a moan and lick my lips.

"Sure?"

"Go ahead, honey."

He slowly brings his hand to my crotch and looks at me one more time. I nod my acceptance and he lowers his fingers to meet my wet skin. As soon as the skin of the tips of his fingers skin rubs mine, I moan and my eyes shut, but I want to see him. He doesn’t turn his face to me anymore, he’s focused on the task right now, and starts rubbing hesitantly. My hips move involuntarily towards his hand and that makes a larger portion of his fingers to be in contact with me. He looks surprised but the continues, and fuck, I didn’t even know how to touch myself in such a delicious way. He brings the tips of his fingers closer to the opening of my vagina and rubs softly, I feel like saying it’s okay if he wants to push them inside right now, but I decide against it, it would be awkward. However, as if he could read my mind, and with the most amazed expression I’ve seen on his face, he pushes one finger in slowly and carefully, but steadily and decided.

"Ah, fuck." I let out in a high pitched voice and he bites his lip, he pushes in a little further and although it hurts a bit, the good feeling is way stronger.And as if it wasn’t enough, he bring himself closer to my body and holy fuck… he kisses my breasts. Shit, his lips are right on my nipple and I don’t even have the ability to gasp anymore. He supports all his weight on his knees to free his hand and grabs my ribs strongly, he kisses my breast a little more until I whisper- fuck me now.

He pulls his finger out gently and I feel like I’ve been teased in a horrible way, now the lust is hungrier and I want all of him right now. He bring his hand back to the side of my body to set his position, and I feel like I could drown in my own drool right now.

I motion my hands towards his hips to pull him closer, and he flinches, but follows. Then I grab his dick so that we get it right. I align him with my vagina and nod. He pushes in slowly, but still it hurts bad, and although I bite my tongue it’s too much, his dick is much thicker than the finger and when it makes its way in, I feel like I’m being torn apart; so I yell and my voice comes out pretty rough.

"You okay?" he asks with concern stopping on his tracks.

"Yes, it’s just, don’t mind, go ahead."

He keeps pushing in and I can’t help but to whimper loudly, ‘cause the pain is still strong but the pleasure starts to take over. He also gives up and starts moaning, and our voices create a canon each time louder, the sound sends me to a numb state where everything around us fades and there’s only his body on mine, only the heat of his skin wrapping me.

I open my eyes and see his shut, in contrast to his mouth, open to take in sharp breaths. That’s honestly the most beautiful sight on Earth and I can’t believe I’m a) witnessing it, b) _causing it_. For some reason, he has stopped, like it’s too much for him to take, I guess, but we’re so deep already that I can’t stop, I need him to push further, so I move my hips towards him and he resumes the thrust.

"Aw Patrick," I whisper when he’s completely inside and I can feel his skin against my crotch. In that moment, we start moving our bodies along and I slide my hands to his hips and squish them. He moans and opens his eyes just a tiny bit, then bites his lip and leans closer to me to kiss me.

"I love you" he says in a rough breath. He kisses again and I follow as my hand finds its way to his hair and stroke it softly.

I rub my leg against his hip and he lowers his body by resting his weight on his elbows. Now that we’re closer I feel how much his skin is actually burning and move my mouth to his ear to moan right there, just to take him to another level, I just wanna feel him a little wilder, I really don’t know why, maybe my rational brain did go to sleep and left this horny part I didn’t really knew about in charge. I start licking his neck and sucking it strong enough not to leave a bruise but to make him groan from the top of his lungs. I hear the bed cracking and wonder if it’s a god or a bad thing.

He starts kissing desperately, he even bites my lip, and it feels perfectly right, but when his hand lands on my cheek and then travels down my neck to my chest, I shiver and anxiety starts burning on my mind, I don’t worry about the bed anymore. His hand rests on my right breast and it fits perfectly, he doesn’t have to open his fingers too wide to cover all of it, it feels natural and I think he must feel comfortable, who said the bigger the better? Ha! This feels amazingly right when he starts massaging softly mimicking the pace of the thrusting. This make me gasp and my eyes are open, but not really looking anywhere, then my eyelids fall slowly and everything turns black. My vagina closes tighter around him and he curses unintelligibly.

"Patrick, please, harder" I articulate the words one syllable at a time, since breathing is really hard at this point. He does as told, he doesn’t even bother questioning if it’s okay right now, he’s given up into dirty and I love it "mhh, harder honey, harder." I really don’t know how he can make that, but I wish he could, because I really need it now.

I get what I ask for, and I may regret it later when my crotch feels sore, but right now, I want it rough. He also speeds up the pace, and his moaning gets louder and louder, I love it, it’s intoxicating. We both give into irrational yelling, my back bends back and I never thought that could happen, he pushes his forehead against mine, and that, ladies and gentlemen is a fucking orgasm, nothing like I’d felt before. For some reason, I think it would be amazing to feel him come inside of me, if only that wasn’t a bit risky right now. I thought what I got from touching myself was good, but this erases anything I thought about pleasure.

Patrick collapses on top of me and our bodies feel like rags, our hearts beat heavily at the same time, our limbs don’t receive orders from our brains. We pant softly, we don’t even have energy for that, no energy for keeping our eyes open, no energy for saying stupid bullshit, no energy to look at each other. I still feel him inside of me and I wish time stopped right now, so we could enjoy this for longer, so I won’t have to face Pete, so I won’t have to face anyone else ever again, just Patrick.

He finally gathers enough strength to lift his body from mine and the sensation of him coming out of my body is really strange, and I start missing him a lot, how empty it feels without him there. He moves to lay next to me, and as he does so, I close my legs, my hips hurt from the stretching and my crotch feels a little sore from the thrusting. He looks at me with dreamy eyes and I almost forget what we just did, honestly, that innocent face can’t give you any dirty idea.

I smile at him and he smiles back, and then kisses me softly. I move closer to him as he wraps his arms around me, and without a word, we fall asleep.

It’s moments like this when I hate my alarm and groan softly when it goes off. Patrick doesn’t even react, it’s so him. I smile to myself and try to wake him up by stroking his hair. Nothing. I don’t stop because it feels really good, his soft hair and the closeness we got, the peace on his features, like he has no worries in the world.

"Patrick…" I whisper while rubbing his shoulder. I really don’t wanna wake him up, hell, I don’t wanna be up myself, but we got to get ready and start the tour day we got ahead. I repeat his name until he kind of moves, I’m close, just once more, "Patrick, darling, please…"

He rubs his eyes and mumbles something. His eyelids part for just millimeters and I shake my head softly.

"Good morning." I say softly, my voice doesn’t wanna come out. He gets closer to me and kisses my forehead gently with his hand on my cheek.

"Morning dear," he says with his lips still pressed on my forehead and doesn’t seem like he has any intention to move.

"We gotta get ready…"

"I know, I hate it. We had a very busy night..." I know he means nothing regarding the concert and I giggle nervously, not really knowing why.

-"Well, that’s our own fault, right?" I say kind of playfully.

"Still, I don’t wanna move, I’m worn out…"

"Okay, I’ll move first..." I say sitting on the bed.

"What? No!" he says wrapping his arms around my waist to bring me back to the bed, "stay with me…" he pleads.

"Thought you didn’t wanna move?" I mock rising an eyebrow and he pouts adorably, "Patrick, we both gotta get ready and meet the others," he keeps his puppy eyes on me, and although I really wanna give into them, we gotta keep it professional in front of the rest, "I’ll shower quickly, you can meet me downstairs, okay?"

"Alright," he says after seconds of hesitation, and then lays back in the bed, "we really can’t stay here all day long?"

"Only if you want to miss the rest of the tour…"

"Crap…"

"It’ll be okay, honey, you can sleep in the bus."

"Fine, I’ll meet you there," he says and then closes his eyes again.

I shake my head and get in the bathroom and as always take a really quick shower, I would like to stand under the water for hours, but my being late would be suspicious, no one questions Patrick’s, but I’m, never late, this can’t be the first time.

As I’m dressing, I rub Patrick’s shoulder again and he kind of reacts. I kiss his temple and ask him not to forget to get up.

I pack all my stuff and sneak out of the room, making sure no one from the crowd sees me, how awkward would that be? I go to my former bedroom and gather the things I left there because I didn’t have time to pack them before the concert. When I come out, I surprised by the really ugly face I didn’t wanna see today.

"Morning Sweet Microphone, had fun last night?"

"Oh, shut the fuck up Pete" I say feeling my cheeks burn and pass by him so that he can’t notice. I lock the door to go and retrieve the keys.

"What, it wasn’t fun?"

"I say shut up!"

"Well, what’s wrong? You had the night of your life, right?"

"May I ask how the fuck you know that?"

"You just have that sexual aura around you, and use the word “fuck” a lot, so I imagine that’s what you did." I roll my eyes and groan, he laughs and follows behind me.

"Stop looking at me that way…"

"I’m just waiting for you to tell me about it."

"There you go with your shitty kink…"

"What?! No, haha, really tell me, he didn’t reject you, what did he say? He said he likes you, right?" I remain silent, but that sort of works as an answer for him. "You’re a little mistrustful microphone aren’t you? I told you I thought about the little guy’s feelings…"

"You didn’t tell me about his crush."

"It wasn’t  _ my _ thing to say, okay? You had to find out yourself, but that’s why I made it, someone had to frame you both or nothing would ever happen."

"You...  _ knew _ it was gonna happen…"

"Off course! It’s a win-win situation for you both, right?"

"You did it even when knowing you couldn’t play pranks on me for a whole month…" that’s too much for Pete’s immature brain, why did he do that then?

"I was thinking about my best friend’s feelings… and, well, even yours," I’m surprised to hear that from him, "I mean, you gotta have some in spite of being a hot-sauce addicted Microphone!" he bursts in laughter.

"Gosh, freaking get over it already?!" I knew he couldn’t talk about me in a nice way without making a rude remark later.

"Haha, okay, okay, just for the sake of the bet. Let’s get some breakfast, Sound Cable."

When we get to the hotel’s restaurant, Andy and Joe are already sitting there, and I get a funny sight from both… holy shit…

"You told them, stinky pants?" I ask Pete between my teeth.

"I didn’t have to…" he answers the same way. I really want an explanation on why people know about last night…

"Hi guys…" says Joe with a weird half-smile and I start to freak out.

"Hey, what’s up guys?" says Pete.

"Not much. Any of you slept?" Joe questions.

"Kind of, busy night right? How ‘bout you, Smith?"

"Me…? No… nothing.. why?" he got me completely off guard, I can’t keep my voice from cracking and giving everything up.

"I was just asking randomly…" replies Joe with that ‘I already fucking know, you idiot’ tune in his voice, "and now I ask Andy, slept well?"

"I did." He says with that emotionless face of his. He’s looking right into my eyes, and although his face is still, I know he’s judging me inside.

"Hey, Smith, you must be really glad…" says Joe being barely able to contain his laughter.

"What? ...why...?"

"Oh, just because you have a pretty healthy set of lungs…"

  
**_THE END_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, tell me if I don't suck at writing smut (I really feel awkward when writing it, I had to write it in third person first to see if I could finish it, not kidding) :v Thanks for reading, either way :)
> 
> *If you want to know how the series work , read part 1 "Prologue" ;)*  
> *-OMG, you write such looong notes!!!  
> -Uhm... sorry? :v


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